Saturday, April 21, 2012

How not to be Forever Alone

Have you ever known that one guys who is actually a genius and knows how things are done but is stuck in a miserable situation? Yeah, this post is for that guy or girl. For that forever alone guy or girl who encounters rejection and gives up hope.

It's often when you do something you enjoy, you lose track of time. This simple statement has evolved into a concept in psychology called the Flow. Immersing yourself into a task or process might seem simple but for some it is a fairly challenging task. Some might even fool kids into thinking that they have ADD (attention deficiency disorder) thereby scarring them for life. But I've known someone who was classified with ADD and had to grow up with that label on his head. The guy's a freaking genius (and no, he is not a character in the fast and furious series). It's often when a person is handicapped with a label, they get this intense urge to outperform. The reason why I like to be around these people is because they emit a certain positive aura, despite all odds. Optimism, hope and faith are very strong driving forces.


This chart indicates the emotions you might experience when you encounter a tasks of a certain challenge level with your expertise at that task (simply put, during flow). You can test it out with yourself while performing some tasks and seeing if the emotions displayed are true. Do let me know in the comments below.

Over the months, I've been promptly following Rule 32 of the Rules of the Internet. Amidst my lurking sprees, it's hard to avoid the rage comics and adventures of Forever Alone. Every time I look at Forever Alone Guy, I won't lie, I did find it amusing. Reflecting upon certain situations, I must admit, there are a few to which I can co-relate to. These are the times when one can't help picturizing himself/herself as forever alone guy.

But the question is - is it really that bad? Personally, I need some time where I need to be left alone. It helps me think better; gives me the space I need. There is a saying in the ancient Indian language of Sanskrit, which goes something like this, "ati parichayasch avadnya". Literally translating this makes it a mess, so I would prefer to convey the meaning behind it. It means, 'if someone or something has always been there, that presence gets taken for granted'. It's closest to the English phrase, "Distance makes the heart grow fonder". Being alone helps you relish the company of people. You learn to appreciate them further.

But if you really don't wanna be this forever alone character, what should you do? How do you stop yourself  from making a rage comic about the funny things that happen to you and later feeling miserable. The thing about not being forever alone is being social. It is by being a contributing member to whatever you are a part of that you can interact with people and people interact with you.

I remember watching Fight Club, a long time ago. What started as a small hobby group ended up becoming a HUGE organization. That truly illustrates how someone can start something and get things rolling. Even if this genius is not recognized or entertained by someone else, they can always start their own jig and get something going. This 2006 movie that I recently watched, Accepted, joins the dots for my hypothesis. Didn't get into a college? No problems, MAKE ONE. If you need it, then there are people out there who need it too; probably, just as bad. If you can't get it, then there are people out there who want it but can't get it either. If you feel lonely and rejected, there are people out there who feel the same! So if you feel that way, try to search for these people and support them with a goal that you share. Coz together, you can't be alone :p

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